Saturday, April 25, 2009
REEL IT IN!
After WEEKS of fiddling with this piece titled, "Abundance," it finally had its way (so petulant!) and became what you see here. I have to admit it holds a special place in my heart, as it taught me a lesson that I've been butting up against lately. To begin, I initially thought of having the girl looking down at the big fish she was catching, but I couldn't get her to not look like she was falling off the edge of the cliff and looking like she might be the intended bait. Insisting on looking up, she had her way, but it didn't make sense to me that she'd be looking up at the sun (there was a sun there initially too)- so the background had to be reworked into a night sky? What was that all about? So once the moon was in, the stars had to follow. Mind you, the whole time, I'm fretting about this new change, actually having ANXIETY about it, which is really not the most ideal 'art making state' to be in. Anyway, to make a long story longer, I really liked the way the rocks had turned out since I had created those first and I was putting my foot down about keeping them bright. I'M the artist, right? So, I thought it was coming together, but something wasn't right. I'll explain. I've made lots of different images- landscapes, stlll lifes, fun work without heavy meaning, but most of the artwork I make does have a level of personal meaning to me that I'm usually aware of as I create it. If I don't initially, it begins to point me toward something more as it is evolving. This image came to me as I thought on 'abundance.' The imagery seemed pretty direct to me, but it threw me for a loop because it had more to say than I could understand, even after I had put 6 coats of varnish on it. It was in the photographing of it that it hit me. No joke, it took me TWO HOURS to get this photograph, and I think it still needs work (just to add to the metaphor I'm getting to. Stay with me.) The truth wasn't easy to see and I know how truth works- there will be more to come! Here's what I have so far....
I'm piled high on the gifts this Universe generously gives me. Abundance is already mine and she's on the line. I'm wishing or PLEADING on that star (and the moon, and the whole Universe!), UNAWARE of the 'GREAT BIG GOOD' all around and WITHIN. 'Wise One,' was trying to get my attention with all my anxiety but I would not hear it- they are whispers after all. Sometimes I just need a good SHOUT to hear it- ALL IS WELL! REEL IT IN! ENJOY IT!
So why so much anxiety? Well, I LIKE TO THINK I appreciate the good things in my life, I certainly SAY I do. The truth.....because I've briefly touched on this elusive wonder- true abundance as I've seen it, is a state of FULLNESS, of KNOWING, of GRACE, of ACCEPTANCE and of DEEP GRATEFULNESS for everything JUST AS IT IS......and the truth is- I'm seeing what I don't want and not seeing what I do.
Allrighty then. I got it, but this time I'm not going to give myself a hard time for not getting it. I AM the artist after all :).